Living with a chronic condition can be like carrying a grand piano on your back while climbing up an increasingly steep hill. Sometimes, when we’re doing well, it’s like we’ve got the whole thing down to a fine science. Other times, despite doing everything right, it’s like the whole thing is random and we get our ass kicked for no apparent reason. Or, we can feel like superheros and in our over-confidence, indulge in one too many triggers.
But the worst times are when we turn against ourselves. I’ll admit that there have been instances where out of frustration, I’ve pushed myself too hard or put myself into overwhelming situations in order just be normal for once. It has sucked. And I have tended to push the big ‘ol self destruct button and made everything ten times worse:
“How could I have been so stupid? I know too many (late nights/ glasses of wine/paragliding holidays/ Celine Dion concerts*) make me feel crappy. Why on earth did I do that? It’s going to take so long to get back on track again. Why do I bother?”
*I am of course, kidding. You can never have too much Celine Dion.
But joking aside, I’m here to tell you it’s OK. In fact, it’s absolutely normal not to be perfect 100% of the time. Just because you have some control over what makes you feel worse or better does not mean you’re to blame when you’re not totally on top of it. When you do over indulge, those aren’t the times to beat yourself up. Those are the times to relax, to breath and to open up a nice big can of #selfcare on yourself.
That’s right. It’s time to put those boxing gloves down and #treatyourself.
Because in the immortal words of the wonderful Robin Williams in Good Will Hunting: